Work Life Balance: The Most Important Habit You’ll Ever Form

An Interview with a Burned Out Business Owner

When you own your own business, especially a small business, finding time for all of the things that make life so great can be difficult. You’re in charge of… well? Everything. It’s easy to let the things that you know in your heart are most important get shifted to the bottom of the to do list. Even just saying that your personal life is a part of a to do list feels a little off when you think about it, right? But it’s true. And you’re not alone. Business Owners are prime candidates for Burn Out because they’re shackled to their work 24/7/365 in many cases. When I started my business, Lissie Lu Virtual Assisting, I knew that I wanted to create a life that I’d always imagined! I wanted freedom from the 9-5 hustle and grind and I wanted to create my own destiny which included lots of time to watch my kiddo grow up. I want to be present for my family and a part of every moment. But I quickly realized that working for yourself? It’s hard. Super hard. And it can be an endeavor that will suck you in, quick. My coach pointed out early on that prioritizing your personal life is a MUST for any small business owner, and I knew she was right. Time Blocking, a subject I will cover in an upcoming blog post, has saved the day for me and revolutionized the way I approach work and life and making them work together. 

But I know that not everyone has work life balance, and I know that it causes big problems for people sometimes. It can even make some people decide to stop working for themselves. How does that happen? How can it be avoided? How can I help my clients avoid big consequences for not balancing out their personal and work lives? I asked myself these questions and then I decided to talk to one of my clients, a woman who has owned many businesses over the past decade plus and who has shared with me in the past that burn out happened to her. I wanted to learn more about avoiding Burn Out, and how Work Life Balance makes all the difference. 

Alyssa: Ann, thank you so much for taking time to discuss Work Life Balance with me. Can you share a little of your story about your business journey and why Work Life Balance is so important? 

Ann: Of course! Thanks for asking me to do this interview, Alyssa. I think that sharing information with fellow business owners is the best way to turn the lemons of my journey into lemonade. I started my first business with all of the gusto and energy any young entrepreneur has. It was an exciting time, and I was all in. I worked ALL the time. I took very little time for myself, and within a few years of starting my first business, I was building a second. I took on everything and felt like I could do it all. But my health was paying the price both my physical and mental health that is. I knew that it wasn’t a sustainable situation. I found myself making very little time, if any, for the people I loved including my spouse. Vacations were even stressful! I was on my phone, emailing or making calls, almost all the time. I remember one night at about 1am, my husband walked into the living room and I could tell he was super frustrated. I barely looked up from my computer-I was working on something I considered very “time sensitive” and couldn’t be bothered. He asked me if I could just remind him what in the world I was working for? It shook me! I knew that I had to make a change. I wish I could say that change was immediate, but it took many more years and a big bout with Burn Out before I finally made the needed changes to my life that would make things better. 

Alyssa: Yikes. That had to be a bit of a wake up call, though, right? I mean, when your family sees something is wrong and you can’t make the changes needed, that’s problematic!

Ann: You bet it is. And it’s super common. Most of my friends own businesses and I’ve seen it happen over and over to them and to colleagues over the years in various industries. Work Life Balance is so much more than just spending some time with the family or going on a vacation. It’s presence and peace at its core. It’s being in a moment and not even caring where your phone is or if it’s on. It’s super hard to do when you feel the pressure of your growing, or worse a struggling, business on your shoulders. But if you don’t make the time for the things that are important, you’ll lose it all. 

Alyssa: I know enough about your story to know you didn’t lose it all, but can you share a little more about that aspect of burnout and how that evolved for you? 

Ann: Sure! A few years and two blooming businesses after that late night talk with my husband, I found myself in the middle of burn out. I would wake up each morning wondering what in the world I was even doing! I was very unhappy. My work was suffering, my business wasn’t booming anymore, and I was miserable. I lost my passion for my work because I was not giving myself time to breathe. I hired a coach and I realized that I needed to align myself and my work with my values in order to succeed. I decided to hire help, a Virtual Assistant actually, and I decided to prioritize my life and my family over everything else. It wasn’t an easy road and this interview might not be long enough to discuss how long it took or all the steps that a were necessary but in short: I assessed my situation and I asked myself the same question my husband asked all those years before. What in the world was I working for? I was working to make a life I was happy with. But I was losing out on the really good life that I already HAD. That made me sad but more than sad, it made me really mad. So I did the work and made the changes. I asked for help, I hired help, and I stepped back and took a long look at my priorities and what I wanted to do in the long run. I set new goals and I implemented tools that made things run more smoothly. That was a few years ago, now, and I’m happy to report that life is going much better and the Burn Out is over! I have a revitalized passion for my work and my LIFE. 

Alyssa: Well, you know I’m a fan of hiring a Virtual Assistant, and I’m glad that we work together and that it has helped change the game for you! But are there any other tips to consider that you find important when recovering from Burn Out and balancing out work and life? 

Ann: Yes, absolutely. It’s all about being grateful for the things we have in the present moment and creating goals that are reasonable for the future. For me, life isn’t about finding this level of success that looks amazing on the outside, or on the “gram” as the kids say. It’s about being happy and knowing that when I am long gone, the people who love me will remember wonderful times we spent together. Not times they spent in my presence while I worked on my phone or laptop. When you take pause and put things in perspective, you really see that money and success aren’t the pinnacle of success. Your relationships are the most important thing in the universe! 

Ann’s insight into the importance of Work Life Balance hit me hard. Thinking about what my goals were when I started my own business has helped me to be super thankful for what I’ve already achieved. I know what my goals are for the future, but I’m keeping my priorities in order as I work to achieve those goals. And my priority is being a present, peaceful presence in the lives of the people who matter the most to me. I am working hard to make sure that I have a balanced life so I can show up as my best self as a Virtual Assistant for my clients, as a business owner who has financial and time freedom goals, and last but certainly not least the best ME I can be for the people who love me. I’m not saying this is easy, but it is NOT impossible. No matter how hard the idea of balancing work and life may feel, it is doable. Outsourcing the things that take up valuable time and aren’t things that ONLY YOU can complete is a great first step. Create time in your schedule for the things that matter the most. Make sure you remember what in the world you’re working for!

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